complete and utter bullshit faggotry

FAKE.

You made this bullshit up its no way near real. Way to fucking fail at journalism you idiot.

This is so beyond fake that it's not even funny.

Your article is not only fake, it's not even believeable--in no small part due to the accompanying images. Bad photoshop is bad. =/

wow this site is gay i dont think ill be coming back

congradulations you win the cookie for being the quickest news people world wide to even remotely cover the global protests today

Wow the mad photoshop skills yo!

umm do you people not get satire

Obviously fake, but I'm disappointed by the satire. Not very funny.

Satire, bitches.

Satire site is satire. To those who don't get this shut-up you are making us look bad.

FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE

Let me get this straight.

You. Actually. Thought. People. Would. Believe. This ? ? ? Almost as stupid as the fake news item posted in Australia earlier today, when Scientologists posted pictures from a protest in 1995 and tried to pass them off as current.

you fail so hard.

Satire, boyz. Satire!

Oh come on people, don't be as bad as the scifags about taking a joke.

Fake article is FAKE.

Man, are the Scilons really this desperate?

GTFO MY INTERNET. NAO.

No, it is real!

I have proof that I assaulted Tom!

this is fake, because i was there for the whole duration. disgusting journalism.

"Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious."
Fail troll is still fail. :D

Failtroll is fail.

lol this is fake but it's satire, guys, chill out. the site is called unconfirmed sources for xenu's sake

Satire is supposed to be funny and mock those within the power structure. This is just a little stupid thing that is made of stupid and fail. Learn to satire, dumbass.

why the fuck did this show up on news.google.com ??????????????????

Fake retardedness. xenu.net is truth, this is lies

Indeed, why the hell was this on google news?

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Its almost too bad its fake. If Tom Cruise really said they are authorized by the FBI to kill people.

Rofl

It has got to be fake. However if its real Tom Cruise and Scientology took the first steps toward violence. Just MORE blood on their hands.

this isn't even lulzy.

wow, you fail at writing satire? an hero yourself, my friend.

Awww. I know it's satire but it wasn't very well written. :(

are these repliers all retards? THE SITE IS CALLED UNCONFIRMED SOURCES. Idiots!
and oh yeah, fuck $cientology.

Unfunny satire. Not unfunny because CoS = srs business, oh no; unfunny because... it's unfunny. Fail satire. The story should be far more over the top considering CoS' claims, and if you want to satirize anon, just make us all look like newfags and we'll be butthurt, but it would be THEN lulzy. Right now it just looks like a reporter that got some misinformation wrote it. What's the point of that? It's unfunny, and if it's not actually that, then what's the point? Improve your writing, young internet satirist. You're failing anon, and you don't want to fail us.

TL;DR--WRITE BETTAR. MAXIMIZE LULZ.

Lulz Irony! Some rubes can't spot humor when it whacks them in the face, can they? Nice chops. Great concept.
(Church of Scientology spokesperson Tom Cruise---sweet!)

You dudes are stupid, it's a satire site

COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS COCKS

Epic fail. Learn to be funny.

Shopp'd

WHAT THE FUCK

Bahaha, didn't anyone read the part where it says "Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious." I mean I also thought it wasn't that funny, but at least I realised it was satire.

IS this some attempt at satire...epic FAILS for this website. Anon is more real than you think. expect us

Oh, no, we are all well aware that it's satire. It's just really not funny at all.

Here Here
sCIENTOLOGIST...OR...DEMOCRAT?

SAME MINDLESS SOCIALIST SHIT

Pretty crappy satire.

Amazing how people call this fake, but the absolutely false report about InfraGard that spawned the "shoot-on-sight" comment was swallowed whole by a large number of people.

Sad commentary...

This post is meant to be satire. But not about the protests. It's about some false new articles appearing using fake pictures. The false new articles claimed that protests in Australia turned violent when they did not. The article had photos used in it from a Halliburton protest, the police uniforms in this pretty much gave it away.

http://forums.enturbulation...

This article is wrong about all but two things: There were global protests, and that the people at the London Church of Scientology wore similar garb.

You clearly weren't there. Anonymous disapproves.

SRSLY GUYZ, THIS IS A PARODY ABOUT A SCIFAG PLANTED NEWS STORY ON INDYMEDIA. IT IS MEANT TO BE FAIL BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL SCIFAG FAKE STORY WAS FAIL.

THIS ARTICLE IS MADE OF WIN AND AWESOME.

U ARE ALL GIAFAGS.

hahaha LOL. And to all those screaming fake?

It's a goddamn parody article. Lighten the fuck up. The interbutts is srs bizness.

I'm pretty sure this is all a satire, so just calm down.

Either that or epic troll.

If you rile the nations of the world through your adamant refusal to disregard literal insanity and cling to your illegitimate ignorace, we will be forced to educate the masses.

If you oppose their education and threaten us with death, so you shall recieve the same. I will no longer restrain those who would go to war. You fools have called them by name, and taunted them to a fight.

Be warned Tom Cruise. You may have started the next Civil War.

It is impossible to determine the state of a statement when the origin is a community bent and driven on artistic expression through and through.

Truly, you must ask the origin of his or her intent when making the statement, and may only recieve and answer in the form of "I don't recall that"(Not serious) or "Yes, I meant that."(Serious).

Well played, Troll, well played.

lulz were had.

FUCK YOU ANON

well played

This is hilarious, nice job.

I lol'd at the dramatization. It would have been funny if Tom Cruise had actually been there. But I'm glad the protests didn't turn violent, since that would have been extremely detrimental to the message.

Mindless, humorless satirical bullshit is MASSIVE FAIL.

FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIFAILTIME FAILTIME FAILTIME HERE'S THE FAIL IT ALWAYS FAILS IT MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM OUT FAIL WHEN IT FAILS I WANNA WAIL FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL

Wow, I thought it was funny, but it seems I'm in the minority? Don't tell me I'm a poor judge of humor! No, that can't be the case... Since the MAJORITY here doesn't even seem to have realized that this is SATIRE.

I'm going to HAVE to assume that the VAST majority of people read this, knew it was satire, and didn't respond.
That is because I cannot even begin to comprehend how any reasonable person would NOT realize this was a joke.

I thought it was funny. I have nothing against anyone who thought it was bad satire. Anyone who DIDN'T know it was satire, though... wow, just wow...

go get some photoshop skillz then try again loser.