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E-E-T News: Obama Ruled American, Priests Against Health Care, Sarah Palin Won't Use The "R" Word

by Ed E. Druckman

(Wasilla-AK) Soon to be Playgirl pin-up and almost son-in-law to Sarah Palin, Levi Johnston seems intent on keeping his almost mother-in-law off balance. This week Johnston accused Palin of frequently describing her son Trig, who has Down syndrome, as "retarded." Palin shot back in an e-mail that CBS, who aired the interview in which the statement was made, was "providing a forum to propagate lies." The statement went on to say, "Trig is our 'blessed little angel' and is lovingly called that every day of his life. But what can you expect from a network run by people who haven't taken Jesus Christ as their savior." (Washington, D.C.) A federal judge dismissed a lawsuit claiming President Barack Obama is ineligible to be president because he isn't a U.S. citizen. The lawsuit claim by the "birthers" maintains that President Obama was not born in Hawaii and if he was his citizenship was invalidated by living overseas as a child. In his ruling, U.S. District Judge David O. Carter of California said the plaintiffs were trying to persuade him to "disregard the constitutional procedures in place for the removal of a sitting president. The process for removal of a sitting president is only within the province of Congress, not the courts." A comment has yet to be made by "birthers", pending explanation to them exactly what the term "constitution" means. (Washington, D.C.) The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops is calling the most recent Democrat House of Representatives health care bills "seriously deficient on the issues of abortion and conscience" and is urging priests around the country to speak out against the legislation to their congregations. The Conference claims the bills would force "Americans to subsidize abortions through their taxes and health insurance premiums." The Conference went on to say that if Catholics elect to have sex for reasons other than procreation followers should avail themselves to the accepted form of birth control endorsed by the clergy, homosexuality. (New York-NY) They call themselves "New Jews", Generation X and Y Jewish Americans, who are bringing the religion's ancient cultural beliefs to modern forms of expression. According to Punk Rocker Patrick A, ""When I'm on stage screaming and pouring beer on my head, I'm singing about the Torah." A is the 26-year-old founder of PunkTorah, an outreach effort to inspire Jewish spirituality. Asked how she felt about her son writhing around on stage screaming from the Torah, A's mother said, "He has time to give you an interview. You think he could take five minutes to call or text?" Subscribe to Ed-E-torial Follow Ed on Twitter. See Amber drop it for Darfur. No, we mean it. Click the player below...NOW! Amber Colt: A Girl And Her Top(less) - Watch a funny movie here

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Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Both “factcheck.org” and “Fight the Smears” (Obama’s OWN website) have publish an ADMISSION that Obama was governed at birth by his father’s British/Kenyan citizenship. That is the ONLY time a person can attain United States “natural born Citizen” status, thus Obama ADMITS he is not, and can never become, a “natural born Citizen” of the United States. Direct quote : “When Barack Obama Jr. was born on Aug. 4,1961, in Honolulu, Kenya was a British colony, still part of the United Kingdom’s dwindling empire. As a Kenyan native, Barack Obama Sr. was a British subject whose citizenship status was governed by The British Nationality Act of 1948. That same act governed the status of Obama Sr.‘s children.
Since Sen. Obama has neither renounced his U.S. citizenship nor sworn an oath of allegiance to Kenya, his Kenyan citizenship automatically expired on Aug. 4,1982.”……..There is no law on Earth that would have caused Obama’s British/Kenyan citizenship to automatically expire on August 2, 1982. Obama is well aware he cannot meet the Constitutional requirement to hold office, that’s why his first official act as president was to sign “Executive Order Number 13489″, which seals ALL his records, public AND private. That is unprecedented and 100% evil. So much for Obama’s instantly broken promise of “transparency”. No one with common sense trusts Obama - NO ONE!.

As our employee, Obama owes a duty to every Citizen of this nation to release all his records to the public. As most are aware, Obama's first official act was to sign "Executive Order Number 13489" (21JAN09), thereby sealing all his records, public and private. So much for his instantly broken campaign promise of "transparency". Why would anyone with nothing to hide take such radical action? Any reasonable person should rightly assume Obama is hiding plenty of background dirt from those whom he claims to represent. Obama needs to come clean, or pack his bags, or both. There is nothing people hate more than an obvious liar and con-man who doesn't have the guts to come clean. The Citizens of this nation are fed-up. It took over two years to investigate and get to the bottom of the "Watergate conspiracy", the larger and already better known Obama deception has only been going on for a little over a year. We shall endure and prevail, so help me God.