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Governor Schwarzenegger to Charlie Sheen: 'You lack moral authority to speak about 911'
by Dominus Noster
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger posing nude for Robert MapplethorpeSACRAMENTO -- California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger recently told a group of reporters that actor Charlie Sheen's "questionable" past renders his views invalid.

"I just want to say to you, Charlie, you lack moral authority to speak about 911 - and other issues, for that matter," said Governor Schwarzenegger.

Governor Schwarzenegger also went on to say that the only way somebody who isn't as pure and holy as Jesus can have the right to speak is by being a Republican.

"Yes, I made some gay porn for Robert Mapplethorpe. Yes, I like to grope women, too. Yes, I have done illegal drugs. Yes, I have written some very hostile things about Christians and Christianity. Yes, I have a nazi background. So what if I'm a degenerate hedonist, I am a Republican. Only Republicans have the right to not be like Jesus," Governor Schwarzenegger told a group of reporters.

Governor Schwarzenegger explained that just by the fact that he is a Republican, that alone earns him the moral authority to have beliefs.

"I'm a Republican, and being a Republican gives me the moral authority to say that Charlie Sheen has no business saying anything about political issues. Being a Republican atones for all of my sins. Not only that, Charlie is an actor, for Chrissakes!" the Governor said.

Governor Schwarzenegger also said that actors who have sinned before have no right to say anything about politics.

"Charlie Sheen has sinned before. A sinful actor has no business questioning the infallible President and the holy U.S. government," said the Governor. "The only qualification a sinful actor has to speak about political issues is to support the Republican Party."

When asked what right a foreign-born, actor-turned-governor, who once posed nude for Robert Mapplethorpe, has to tell an American-born actor that they lack the moral credentials to question Bush administration lies, Governor Schwarzenegger responded by saying, "Again, I am a REPUBLICAN! The Bill of Rights has been suspended for all non-Republicans."

 
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Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Your Comments



Casey wrote:
LMAO this is funny as all hell!
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Need Truth wrote:
Not to mention good old Arnold posed in GAY porn magazines and his father was a NAZI. Before you reply, do a Google search and see for yourself. What a joke. Who the hell does he think he is to say who can question the governments offical story which has more holes than swiss cheese? The pot calling the kettle black, I say!
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Robert Stevens wrote:
Charlie raised some good issues that every American should explore:

Watch the collapse video of World Trade Center Building 7 at http://www.wtc7.net

Read BYU Physics Professor Dr. Steven Jones' paper at http://www.physics.byu.edu/...

Watch the Loose Change Video at http://video.google.com/vid...

Regards,

Robert Stevens
Highland, Utah
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Pancho Villa wrote:
Take these turkeys to the slammer that's what I say and throw the key away that means by arnie, georgie 1+ 2, donnie, condi,jebbi,gonzie,
ascrowie, jeweliani, woflie and and anyone else they associate with and lets do it NOW!!!!!!!

TAKE THE COUNTRY BACK NOW!!!!!!!!
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doogie howser wrote:
i voted for arnold and i plan on reelecting him and bush (+4 more years!). again They are keeping us safe from all the terrorists. lerking outside the boarders. come on and support your leadership while we drive off this cliff
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american student wrote:
Hah, yeah you had me scared for a sec when you said "I plan on reelecting him and bush." I really REALLY hope Bush is somehow impeached before he can finish our country off. He's already ruined our reputation, our economy is holding together on thin ice, not to mention he's responsible for the deaths of thousands and thousands of Iraqi's and Americans (including 911). It's a sad day in America, I hope I can get enough points to immigrate to NZ before it becomes impossible. (I know I'm chickening out but you know, I don't feel the least bit responsible for this mess).
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american student wrote:
Not to mention the fact that Bush is in his second term, if he were in fact re-elected I would run (screaming all the way) not walk for the nearest exit.
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Dominus wrote:
After consulting with the law firm of Ike N. Steele and Emma Faye Kerr, I have been advised that I must take an immediate course of action for the sake of me and my family.

In case you are unaware, the United States has slipped into a hellish police state. Due to Federal Communications Commission guidelines, and a vindictive Bush administration, I have been informed that I will be imprisoned for displaying a nude photograph of Governor Schwarzenegger if I am not able to flee the country within 24 hours.

The President of my country - George W. Bush - has already signed the vesting order, calling for the seizure of all my assets and my bank account. Fortunately, most of my money is stashed away in a safe, off-shore account. The sum total of my off-shore accounts is in excess of $10,000,000.

In order for me to access these funds, I first need to flee the country. Before I can do that, I have been instructed that I must first raise $100,000 to bribe the Commissioners of the FCC.

Please forward all of your personal and financial information in an email, addressed to BankWireTransfertoBribeFCCOfficials @BankWireTransferfor DominusNoster.com. If you can be of assistance you will be rewarded with the 50% total value of my off-shore accounts.

From an undisclosed location,
Dominus
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Angry, empowered citizen wrote:
Arnold Schwarzenegger is a worthless scumbag. He lacks any positive human aspect. Any attribute that Arnold Schwarzenegger displays, which appears good, is simply a facade he must promote, because he is in fact a sick, pitiful, decrepit Nazi operative. His words are lies, and will only become soars on the ears of those who believe him.
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just a passenger wrote:
I just wanted to say that I am really glad to see there still are many, many normal people who do not like the way the US goes at this moment.

I only hope we won't just gather like this on the web and only talk. I hope we will take action and make better future, for us all.
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Soul Saks wrote:
Not bad, but you'd benefit from a basic course in comedy writing through the UCLA extension. Funny first...message second. B- on the whole. Keep improving, edit, edit, edit.
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shane wrote:
mapplethorpe was an artist, nimrods.
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German Laughter wrote:
If his father was a nazi - who cares?
He s governor of a big state - you votet him!
His nude pics are nice - he worked hard for his body - so what?!
America becomes what it earns... a big superman-show
you are all green with envy and throwing with mud.
you failures, why dont you try to do it better... you could start with learning a second language...

Amerikaner sind doch wirklich die scheinheiligsten Wichser auf der ganzen weiten Welt...
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howard robard hughes IIV wrote:
THey ALL work for CBS-sony and they are just yackin your chain 4or $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.One`ness is the rule in the wood hood or HOODswood.MAN they killed howard robard hughes JR took the internet,satellitenet and free billions for the collegefratmobmansons.Me I was robbed for trillions but it was bloodmoney anyWHO
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howard robard hughes IIV wrote:
THey ALL work for CBS-sony and they are just yackin your chain 4or $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.One`ness is the rule in the wood hood or HOODswood.MAN they killed howard robard hughes JR took the internet,satellitenet and free billions for the collegefratmobmansons.Me I was robbed for trillions but it was bloodmoney anyWHO
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scott harrold wrote:
Breaking every federal trade law for the hoolywood mob doe`snt make you a american.Takeing 3rd world dope doesn`t make you a body builder and get you a bypass and a bad liver.Mob mouth peace.Money money money goverment owned by trilate sold off to highest bidder some china slave owner like.You can`t play if the take thier foot ball home with them-it`s their game and we don`t get to play unless we sign up and shutup.
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Dixie wrote:
Let's see if the one of the two joker's up for the role, Obama Hussein or Billary can do a better job. And by the way, COLLEGE STUDENT, Bill Clinton is the one that got the ball rolling on most of the mess that were in now. Do some research! You frickin idiots are all the same, blame the guy in charge, the very Guy most of you voted for, and then whine like little pansies about the piss poor job he's doin. Makes me sick. If you don't like it, get the F--k out, and take Charlie with you.
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Dixie wrote:
The only reason Billary wants to be President is because she didn't get to finish stealing everything she wanted from the White the first Go-round. She's a dipshit, just like her husband.
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Andy Cipollo wrote:
I`am the real howard hughes/andy cipollo the one you all saw was a fake.See 100 year old howard hughes at my space
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Andrew Cipollo/my story wrote:
Atlas trust fund wants your money off shore to clean up.
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andy Cipollo wrote:
Andy Cipollo above is libelous and also a shadow murder crew of real hughe`s kid`s/gran kid`s
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Howard_Hughes`s wrote:
Howard Hughes-wrote this andy cipollo is not a howard robard hughes Jr`s baby he is a offshore/trustless trust me.He was in fact howard hughes`s HA HA HA the one you saw was a fake and the one you see now is a fake also I`am the real andy cipollo and a trillionare and I rule the world so bendover?.
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Andy_Cipollo wrote:
Mike sunderland is lieing-I`am not a son of howard robard hughes JR-I use to work as a howard hughes look alike in the UK
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Dave Morrissey wrote:
David Morrissey is andy cipollo-who is this fake?.Tom morrissey lincoln nebraska can tail you!.
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TMZ wrote:
TMZ I love your old nuttSSz
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TMZ III wrote:
Arnold Schwartzenegger.danny devito shylock SS kichen cabinet#501 Loves TMZ licking my dirty old low low nut sack-how low can you go TMZ?,their old and thier LOW.Gat down there and lick`um BOy(SS) at TMZ it`s the hardest botton to button.
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Old JOCK wrote:
TMZ is in love with the mobster governer`s old nut sack lower then his non jock big one incher!!
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Hughes`s KID wrote:
KILLroy(SS) your`ll have to be harder than that to kill the hughes`s kid
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