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The Dood Abides

Dominus Noster

Ed E. Druckman

Britney Threatens Harper's with Lawsuit after Nude Cover Bumped by Rice

by Dood Abides

Condoleezza Rice appears on the controversial cover of August's Harper's Bazaar

New York (APE) - Teen idol Britney Spears threatened the publishers of Harper's Bazaar with a multi-million dollar lawsuit today when it was revealed that her controversial pregnant nude cover and spread was being bumped by a similar pictorial of Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. Harper's stated that it had never made a firm commitment to Spears and that the magazine had exercised its editorial rights to bring a story that would be of more interest to its readers.

"This is our fall shopping review issue," stated a Harper's editor, who wished to remain anonymous for legal reasons, "we felt that Ms. Rice would be a far better tie in with this theme. Condi had a much better story to tell, as well."
Ms Rice reveals her first child, Walker

Rice, in a similar situation to Spears, will reportedly include nude photos of her first child, and elaborate upon the circumstances behind her now second pregnancy. Rice steadfastly refuses to reveal the identity of the father of the two children, citing national security concerns, but speaks at length about the rigors involved in successfully concealing her first pregnancy while maintaining a full time job.

In the issue, Rice describes her experiences on shopping in Europe under a tight budget with time constraints.

Rice was asked to comment upon how the controversial article and photo spread might reflect upon her position in the Bush Administration. She stated, "I pride myself as always being on top of things... at the same time, you try to plan carefully, but leaks happen. I really don't see how this will affect my abilities to continue to serve the President. I think that, as Americans, we should all just trust President Bush. If he says we're protected, then we're protected."

Lawyers representing Britney Spears refused to comment.

BONUS!! Here are some other photos from the shoot: condibazaar2, condibazaar3, condibazaar4

Enjoy!

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Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Your Comments

bensitin wrote:

funny & fair, johnnny carson woulds loved it.

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tubesteakboogie wrote:

Dr. Condoleezza Rice entered the room wearing only a red satin bra and panties. On her feet was a pair of black stiletto sandles. I immediately drop to my knees and began to grovel at her feet." I love you Condi " , I whimper. While kissing her toes. I caught her musty scent mixed with Aimez Moi perfume by Caron. I become aroused . I attempt to run my hand up the back of her calf. but Condi instructed me to go to the black leather couch. Condi sat down and I laid face down across her lap and
she began to spank me. At first the slaps were light but after a few moments they came harder and more rhythmic . Her fingers left red welts in my pasty white ass. After a few minutes my ass checks became sore and I began to anticipate the slap before it came. The pain was becoming unbearable and Condi was showing no signs of letting up, she was clearly enjoying inflicting this pain on me. In her slapping frenzy her long red finger nails removed bits of skin from the inside of my ass cheeks making the pain exquisite. About three minutes later the slaps began to waver, clearly Condi's right arm was getting tired. It was good for me as the pain was becoming almost unbearable . Now my ass cheeks felt red hot and although I felt like crying out, I did not. I could not let Condi see my pain . If she sensed I was in agony this would provoke her to hit me harder and I couldn't take much more . Shortly after that the spanking stopped altogether, she was exhausted . I looked over my shoulder to see her beautiful black skin covered with sweat and could hear her heavy breathing. I became aroused even further. I sat up and we embraced. I kissed her forehead and could taste the saltiness of her skin. I repeated again " I love you so much Condi ". We then traded positions , now it was my turn to spank her. "Condi lowered her panties and lay across my lap.
"Condi " I said, "you have been a very bad girl and now I'm going to give that black ass a proper
spanking." I feel Condi's wetness on my legs. Now she is aroused.

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Inkydo wrote:

JERUSALEM – While U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was in the Middle East meeting at the same time of Israel's military campaign in Lebanon, media outlets controlled by Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas' Fatah used racist rhetoric in their reports. An article warned, "Beware of this 'black spinster,' we don't want to say 'the black widow' out of respect for her femininity and her intelligence."

Referring to the American representative as the "black woman," "raven," "colored dark skinned black lady" and "black spinster." Then the rhetoric turned ugly with references to “Black Ice Queen, ““that old, black Ho,” “Bush’s Black Booty Call” and “Cum Sucking Shill.” But, a cartoon published the next week in the PA controlled Al Quds blew the top off of all that shit and depicted Rice pregnant with a monkey and the caption, "Rice speaks about birth of new Middle East."

The usually eloquent Condi has remained silent about this for several weeks, but broke her silence today after publicly criticizing Clinton’s remarks last week regarding his plans for finding bin Laden. After reinforcing the contention that “Clinton Lied” and only left tons of porn on the White House computers when he left, Condi also addressed the “monkey” references”.

“I am not pregnant with any monkeys at this time,” she stated for the record. However, Democrats seized the opportunity to accuse President Bush of being the father of Condi’s monkey. “You have to admit, there is an uncanny resemblance to the monkey depicted in Al Ouds and President Bush,’ said one Democrat party official who preferred to remain anonymous. Bush declined to defend himself and instead left it to his attack dog and VP Cheney. “Not only is Condi not pregnant with a monkey, but the President wouldn’t be the father, even if she were,” Cheney began. “Everyone knows he fucks her up the ass,” he explained. The Vice-President added that he on occasion likes “get some of that black stuff” but prefers to “shoot her in the face”.

Clinton was reached for comment, but reportedly couldn’t stop laughing his ass off.

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MarchDancer wrote:

LOL LOL My son called me earlier to say, "Leaks happen, Mom! They're not complete protection!" Honest. I had just picked myself up from the floor when your photo spread came to my screen. OMG! LOL

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topperjax wrote:

I was roflmao over this one
No, really, this is a very serious photo shoot, and I think she should be commended for her temerity
(rolls eyes)

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amanuel wrote:

HI HI

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love wrote:

i fuck it

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maggiehere wrote:

Cool...More and more people are interested in nudism now. Even many celebs posed nude, recently such as Angelina Jolie, Sophie Monk. Their nude

videos&photos were found on nudistconnect.com . It is? porn path? No, I do not think so. Many celebrities have the nude photos, because they

are interested in nudism. Being naked is comfortable and healthy.Nudism is divine and natural, do not regards as porn.

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John McCain wrote:

I want to see a spread of Palin preggers, nude and skinning a moose!

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nickfun wrote:

Hey Dood! We haven't seen a new story from you in a while! I hope you're OK!!!

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