Unconfirmedsources.com


Clinton Shaves Head in Support of Britney Spears and Campaign Hire

by Dood Abides

Florence, SC (APE) - Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton today stunned supporters in South Carolina with a newly shaven head at campaign appearances in South Carolina. Clinton claimed that the new look was in support of pop star Britney Spears' attempt at a brand-new makeover of her life and career. Clinton also took the opportunity to categorically deny that her campaign had essentially offered $200,000 in business towards the consulting firm of State Senator Darrell Jackson in order to receive an endorsement from influential black politicians. Clinton stated that the shorn look was her way of demonstrating that she had nothing to hide. Speaking at Allen University, a traditionally black college in Colombia, Clinton took questions from the crowd. When asked if she felt that shaving her head and associating with Spears might prove to be a mistake in the long run, Clinton said, "I don't think so, I can really identify with Britney. I think that if she knew then what she knows now about her former husband Kevin, she certainly wouldn't find herself in the predicament that she is in now... there would have been no need to shave her head. Perhaps a shaved head is a good way to apologize for your own shortcomings to yourself and others when you just can't seem to find the words." Senator Jackson reaffirmed that the $200,000 business deal had nothing to do with the endorsement of Clinton's candidacy, but that it would certainly go a long way towards making her the Democratic candidate most likely to win. He further stated that with the same or possibly less financial backing, Illinois Senator Barak Obama would probably look more likely to win. In a related story, Clinton's locks have reportedly surfaced for sale on eBay, as well as those of Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton.

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Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Although there may be some underlying mental things going on with Ms. Spears,(totally understandable) I don't think that people should be making such a big deal about her hair. There is many other things in life to report about and if she wants to shave off all of her hair, for what may symbolize as a 'fresh start', or getting rid of fried, damaged hair, more power to her!! If only more people could be so bold!

Alison G.
Traverse City, Michigan

I love the new look. Bravo to Hillary. Makes her look 10 years younger.

Mike H
Bedrock, IN

so this is soooo not even true

what the hell are you talking about, she looks aweful. And if she can relate to britany in any way she should not be president. what a fool to shave her head, this only hurts her chances to win. and my guess she did this for some other underlying reason not to look like her girl britt.

this is bs. photoshop adobe does wonders. Why would she jeapordise her stature?Jim King

She only proves what a fool she really is. Monkey see monkey do. A president should be a leader not a follower.

Can you believe the fools above who think this is a real news item? Just goes to show you that watching too much Bill O'Reilly really does lower your IQ

Ken, Jim, Bill, my friends you're idiots if you think this is a real article. There's a disclaimer underneath that says it's fictitious! For God's sake it's under the HUMOR section...try getting one--Republicans! Your buddy Bush probably thought it was real too!

This represents, quite graphically, what I have felt all along. Considering her "ordeal" with Bubba (Bill), and her... nearly radical comments about various things, including her defense of murderers, she has no business even running for President. She needs to be in a home somewhere, where responsible people can take care of her. She is sick.

Yo Ernie -Hate to break it to ya, but Hillary didn't actually shave her head. See, there's this amazing new technology called "photoshop". People can actually take a photo of bald britney's head and merge it with Hilary's face to make it look like she done shaved her head. AMAZING, I know. Totally astounding what science and the internet can do this days, huh?

You might also want to look up the words: parody, satire and ficticious - all of where the editor of this wesbite uses to describe any stories published on here. In Britney-speak, ficticious means "Like, made up, Y'all" and in English, that reads: NOT TRUE.

This is such a laugh! Based on the falling public opinion of Hillary Dillary Dock, it's not surprising to see someone poke fun at her.

Wow, amazing what made you guys think it was FAKE... could it be taht this web site is a parody site. Maybe this will help you guys

Unconfirmed Sources
UN= meaning NOT
Confirmed = to give new assurance of the validity of : remove doubt about by authoritative act or

political satire
1 : a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn
2 : trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly

and news story parodies

Parodies = 1 : a literary or musical work in which the style of an author or work is closely imitated for comic effect or in ridicule
2 : a feeble or ridiculous imitation

as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.

Fictitious = 1 : of, relating to, or characteristic of fiction : IMAGINARY
2 a : conventionally or hypothetically assumed or accepted <a fictitious concept> b of a name : FALSE, ASSUMED

Do you GET it know

Bef:
I don't believe that any of these people that wrote negetive things about Hillary Clinton really believe that article. I'll bet that each one of them are right wing, born again christains and republicans. Each one of them a certified NUTS. They said what they said in hopes of discrediting her in some way.
That born again crap they believe in make them ill rational and idiotic.

She is the best! I mean she did run the country for 8 years before this idiot took over haha

<<That born again crap they believe in make them ill rational and idiotic.>>

Right, but we can spell irrational. Exactly how is it that born again Christians ruin your life or anyone else's? Is it because we oppose abortion? Maybe its because we don't believe in the THEORY of evolution. Maybe its just because you don't want to hear what they have to say about their faith. Guess what, lots of people don't want to hear your opinion either, but thats the beauty of 1.Freedom of speech 2.Freedom of religion. If this country spent as much time and energy on keeping tabs on its borders as it did trying to keep the words "In God We Trust" out of government, and off our currency we would be a much better place. Lets not forget, it was not "born again Christians" that crashed planes into the WTC, the Pentagon, or that field in PA. This country, and the world have far bigger things to worry about than Christians, and what they believe in.

"Now, that's freedom!" Ask any person in America or the World who faces themselves in the mirror wasting time on blowdrying, gels, etc. "Would it not be nice to just go, and not mess with you hair for the day?" "Huh?" Don't lie to yourselves, everyone has said it at least one time or another. Regardless sex, gender, race! It grows back and it will $cost$ you! Thanks

Wonder what she will have to say when she learns BILL fathered the baby of ANNA Nicol Smith?

Wow The things people think are true.
It reminds me of the time the Loch Ness Monster Hi-jacked a UFO and Crashed in to Bigfoot's SUV
And to the guy who has a problem with born again people my Prayers are with/ and for you hopefully you can will find The Truth 1 day.. It is out there

The irony is that the idiots that think that this is a real news item are the democrats that would vote for her. Just proves once again that democrats believe what they are told, as long as it's by other democrats, no matter how inaccurate it may be.

A newly shorn Hillary Clinton is another
reason I think of her as "Hilarious"
Clinton ...

Vince
Wellington, KS 67152

long hair hippies, career College Students,unemployed yahoos with no family or responsibilities make up 90% of the Liberal population. Liberals have plenty of time for internet blogging. For those of you who think you are smarter than everyone else. You will pay after 2008!!! Youll be crying to your mama, help me! help me! I am so sorry I thought I could negotitate with terrorist, now I am captured and have no freedom to blog my stupid opinions!!! help me help me help me. I'm sorry Conservatives you were right, we should have tried to wipe out terrorism on Arab soil. Now we are fighting terrorism on American soil and they have captured me. help me America Help me. I wish we would have used interrigation Like Bush wanted to and maybe we would have found out enough info to destroy islamic facism. Boo hoo boo hoo I hqve no freedom now! wah wah wah

I don't believe that shaving your head is the beginning of the new YOU. You can never change who you are. We all made mistakes in life but we can never reincarnate ourselves mentally or pyschologically and shave our heads just to show other that this is the new "ME" (YOU).. its ridiculous.. It's too tv.. I personally think that it shows how weak of a person Hillary is and Britney. FRESH START and to support Britney? You have got to be kidding me. And I agree, President should be a leader not a follower. Stay away from hollywood for once.

I bet she'll go adopt a foreign baby next.

Hey y'all,
if this was only a true story I would have basked in the fact she was making a fool of herself..
We certainly aren't ready for a female President and especially one that could ever compare herself to Spears in any way.
If only it were true,,,,,god I love it

What a ballsey woman! What a country, when women make a "No more Bush " statement.
What next?

Man, she looks like E.T. on acid.

DUMB DUMB WOMEN LOST HER MIND COMPLETLEY..GONE PLUMB SCREWY.

Netscape will post Anything to discredit a Democratic presidential candidate won't they.

right on k shafer....you have spoken truth

What is the next trend going to be....Cone heads!?!....the international symbol of self awareness and social acceptance,....excuse me, but Yoga can work wonders too...Helloo!!!!

oh, I forgot to mention something that goes along w/ the rat/restaurant infestation in New York......Hillary's zone, ya know.... A Local Kentucky Fried Chicken offers a "Hillary Special". It includes: Small breast, fat thighs and a Left Wing......

Hillary's town...A local New York KFC offers a "Hillary special" It includes : Small breast, big thighs and a left wing.

She's a fool for following a young woman who is so full of anger and obviously having trouble with her life right now. Yeah, that's the kind of president I want. Neither one are role model material.

Holy Cow! what a freak show and desperete times we live in, cowabunga!

k shafer wrote:

long hair hippies, career College Students,unemployed yahoos with no family or responsibilities make up 90% of the Liberal population. Liberals have plenty of time for internet blogging
...Jesus had long hair, you douche! By the way, you certainly had alot of time on your hands to write that load of crap!!

Hellloooo, people, did you not see the statement RIGHT ABOVE the 'your comments' section that said it's parody and fictitious? These are the genius voters who elected Bush... God help us.

I'm sorry, you're right! We cons (conservatives) tend to get a little crazy
from time to time. This war is crazy. They didn't even have any nukes or anything to do with terrorist attacks, and we still bombed the shit out of them. I wish I'd seen it your way long ago. Peace in the East!!!

That's the spirit brother, yess!
We can see things eye to eye. And for the last time, can you just call 'em French Fries again

<<Lets not forget, it was not "born again Christians" that crashed planes into the WTC, the Pentagon, or that field in PA. This country, and the world have far bigger things to worry about than Christians, and what they believe in.>>
Wow, this guy is a nutcase! Everyone knows that Bush was flying the plane that shot the missile into the Pentagon, so yes, my friend, Born-agains played a rather big role in that whole mess.

JBOO hello.. "statement RIGHT ABOVE YOUR COMMENT??" looks like these genuis voters who elected bush made a fool out of jboo.. obviously we all know this article is ficticious... but u probably think we dont. That's sad... it's not even funny but i'll laugh anyway hahaha =P... God Bless You... Pls don't shave your head.

T. Durden is right. The one thing this whole world has to worry about the most is
George Bush. Second is the Axis of Oil. The third thing is who is going to win American Idol. And the last thing is, what will Britney do next... Oh wait, it's just our imbecile country that cares about that.

I just wish Britney and Justin would get back together.

FYI: Whether HIllary has hair or is bald, she is 5/2 Vegas odds wagering "Futures" politics betting line to become the next President of the USA! The next in line is John McCain at 7-1 and the remainder of the field are longshots. Wake up people! The "line" in Vegas does not stray far from being "right on" as that is how they make their billions of dollars each year. They are usually right, so get ready for a female Pres in 2008 who is married to a guy named "Bill" If you do not believe this, simply check it out the next time you are in a Vegas casino!

She is preparing to US MARINE camp and she will be first president trained MARINE.

You can tell it's not real due to the bad photoshop work on it. The head isn't finished smoothly you can see the irregular bumps on it and the sides are too blurry, real photographs don't have blurry sideburns. Obviously a jew must've done this.

oh C'mon, the real Ron jeremy isn't an antisemite!

On another subject, a bunch of websites have swiped this photo and said she did it to protest Barack Obama's lead in polls and support from opeah. Go figure.

Mental Issues and Drugs is why Spears did what she did, can anyone argue that? From what I have seen on the media this is why she did it. Therefore, I don't think this should be looked upon as BOLD in a positive way. She should have been home with her kids, reading bed time stories. Not out of her mind (from drugs and alcohol)shaving her head. I feel bad for her kids; hope she gets some help! Bold, is seeing there is a problem in her actions and making things right with those she has hurt (including herself). Remember all, the media reports (true or not I don't know) she did this after a night of partying. As far as H. Clinton; she is interesting looking as a hairless woman. Who knows if she really DID shave her head, but nonetheless, we now know what she looks like without hair. Have a happy Day!

heather mills-that shaved egged head sob is trying 2 off me.Butt with out the beatle money I would be in deep mootaz

omg, are you all fricken stupid? you all actually believe that she actually shaved her head? lol, insolence... Its just photoshop, like a few others have said, if u look closely, around her hand by her thumb, on her head, its all blurry where they just added the somewhat same color to make her look bald. just take a gander at the blurry-ness